In a two parent family, I don't think enough gets said about the single parenting phenomenon. Now, I do not want to take anything away from single parents who do not have a significant other to share the parenting duties with, but I must stand up for those of us who often parent alone without the support of our SO.
What is happening is in today's family with two parents, many of those parents are working and their schedules are sometimes manipulated to allow for baby to have less time in daycare. In my situation, my SO works nights and one weekend day, while I work days and am off on the weekends. This allows baby to be with a parent for 21 out of 24 hours 5 days a week with one parent on duty all day on weekend day and both parents available the other weekend day, unless my SO gets scheduled for another weekend day, which sometimes happens (sigh).
This means that my SO and I spend a great deal of time with baby all by ourselves with no support or anyone to turn to when you need a break or to eat dinner. We are very fortunate to have family around, but life and baby's schedule requires you to be home and getting life stuff done, so family only goes so far.
What this schedule creates is a lot of stress on the parents, which I have to believe is similar to the stress felt by parents going it alone. I don't know what anyone else thinks, but I think we should give it up for all of the time any parent spends going it alone.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Got Milk?
As any Mom will tell you, routine is the key. Routine is not the key for baby, but they key for you to ensure that all of babies needs are met and that he stays healthy, happy, and you manage to not pull your hair out. Change the schedule and Mom could quite easily lose it.
I have a set routine of getting up, getting baby ready for the day, going to work, picking up baby from the Grandparents, going home, getting all baby items ready for the next day (i.e. bottles and pump parts washed, bottles set up, etc.), and getting baby and myself to sleep in order to do it all again the next day. My partner works at night, so he takes care of baby in the morning. In some ways we are very much like single parents, but the schedule works as baby gets a lot of one-on-one time with us and the Grandparents.
Tuesday was a typical day, left work, went to the Grandparents' to pick up baby, had dinner, left the Grandparents', went to the grocery store to pick up items we had already run out of, and then went home. I walk in the door with baby, who by the way is already ready for bed, set down all of the bags required to support baby throughout the day, and got ready to unpack bottles to wash and milk to fill the clean bottles. No milk! I did not have my bag of milk.
See, it was an unusually warm day, so when I went to pick up baby I brought the milk bag in to the Grandparents' so that there was no way or anything bad to happen to it. I don't usually do this because the weather has been so cold that the interior of my car is typically colder than a refrigerator. Needless to say, I packed up baby and left without the milk.
I was furious. Furious at myself, furious with the fact that I have to pump in the first place, furious that I parent alone at night, which means I don't have a back up when I do stupid things like leave the milk at the Grandparents' house. Just furious. At this point baby is ready for a bath and sleep ASAP. He is in no mood to get back in the car, but Grandpa turns his ringer off when he watches baby and he often forgets to turn it back on, so I was unable to get in touch with him. Grandma was still at work and not answering her phone. I frantically called them over and over, all the while baby is getting more and more agitated that I am deviating from the schedule.
Finally, I pack baby up in the car, he starts crying, and I start the drive to the Grandparents' house. I am not two minutes away from my house when Grandma calls. She can hear baby in the background and quickly says the milk will be brought. About ten minutes later, Grandpa pulls up, knight in silver pick-up truck. I have never been so thankful.
Baby gets a bath and bed, Mom's got milk, and another lesson in parenting comes to an end.
I have a set routine of getting up, getting baby ready for the day, going to work, picking up baby from the Grandparents, going home, getting all baby items ready for the next day (i.e. bottles and pump parts washed, bottles set up, etc.), and getting baby and myself to sleep in order to do it all again the next day. My partner works at night, so he takes care of baby in the morning. In some ways we are very much like single parents, but the schedule works as baby gets a lot of one-on-one time with us and the Grandparents.
Tuesday was a typical day, left work, went to the Grandparents' to pick up baby, had dinner, left the Grandparents', went to the grocery store to pick up items we had already run out of, and then went home. I walk in the door with baby, who by the way is already ready for bed, set down all of the bags required to support baby throughout the day, and got ready to unpack bottles to wash and milk to fill the clean bottles. No milk! I did not have my bag of milk.
See, it was an unusually warm day, so when I went to pick up baby I brought the milk bag in to the Grandparents' so that there was no way or anything bad to happen to it. I don't usually do this because the weather has been so cold that the interior of my car is typically colder than a refrigerator. Needless to say, I packed up baby and left without the milk.
I was furious. Furious at myself, furious with the fact that I have to pump in the first place, furious that I parent alone at night, which means I don't have a back up when I do stupid things like leave the milk at the Grandparents' house. Just furious. At this point baby is ready for a bath and sleep ASAP. He is in no mood to get back in the car, but Grandpa turns his ringer off when he watches baby and he often forgets to turn it back on, so I was unable to get in touch with him. Grandma was still at work and not answering her phone. I frantically called them over and over, all the while baby is getting more and more agitated that I am deviating from the schedule.
Finally, I pack baby up in the car, he starts crying, and I start the drive to the Grandparents' house. I am not two minutes away from my house when Grandma calls. She can hear baby in the background and quickly says the milk will be brought. About ten minutes later, Grandpa pulls up, knight in silver pick-up truck. I have never been so thankful.
Baby gets a bath and bed, Mom's got milk, and another lesson in parenting comes to an end.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)